To Lie, or Not to Lie

With Christmas sneaking up on us and being a mom of two, I can't help but think about Santa Claus and the lies we tell our children from day one.

It's all in the Christmas spirit to tell a child that Santa Claus is real and my husband and I even took things to the next level by giving our son an Elf On The Shelf. For those of you who have never heard of this, it is a book set that comes with the child's very own elf, which they get to name. The story is that each night the elf magically flies back to Santa's workshop and reports to him about the child's behavior and when they wake up the next morning the elf will be in a different spot in the house each morning until Christmas, when the elf then retreats back to the North Pole until the following year.

My son, who is seven, truly believes in all of this Christmas magic and it makes the holidays extra special and magical for everyone, including our two year old daughter. Although, I can't help but feel awful each morning when we wake up and he looks for Zeke. ( His elf) The excitement in his eyes is priceless. But then I think about how betrayed he might feel when he finds out one day that this was all something we made up.

I believed in Santa Claus until I was in middle school, until people told me I was a loser and that Santa Claus wasn't real. At which point I ran home, heartbroken, and begged my mother to tell me the truth. Once she revealed that the magical man of Christmas wasn't real, I actually cried and felt so hurt.

Is it wrong to lie about Santa? Should we emphasize the true meaning of Christmas and the religious aspect behind it all? I am one of those people who love to go crazy when it comes to gifts for my kids, but I just feel so bad about making up the reasons behind where the gifts come from.

Am I totally alone in all of this??

Dead Give Away

Being a mother is bittersweet. There are the great days, when your child is the picture of perfection and everything goes according to plan, then nap for three hours in the afternoon, sit like an angel at the dinner table, give you lots of hugs and kisses and you play blissfully until it is bedtime.

Then there are the days you wonder why you ever wanted children in the first place. There are tantrums after trantrums, food falling on the floor at dinner, pasta flying and don't let me forget the forty-five minute nap they took before noon.

At the end of the day it all really is worth it and you know you love your children no matter what kind of embarresments they put you through.

(My son at age three, screamed his head off all the way through the checkout line at Target and continued his tantrum all the way to the car and for the entire drive home over some dumb ass toy that he totally forgot about an hour later.)

Sometimes you can just look at a woman and tell she is a mother. Here is my list of, You Know You're A Mom If...

1. You have stickers anywhere on your body and don't realize until someone random stranger is pointing at your forehead and when you look in the mirror, Spongebob, or Hello Kitty is stuck to it.

2. You smell like soy milk, breast milk, or any kind of formula

3. You've become so immune to the smell of shit that it takes someone else to tell you your child has a poopy diaper.

4. You continue to watch the cartoon, or Disney movie, even after your child has lost interest or left the room

5. You tell other adults you have to go potty.

6. Your idea of date night involves Ben and Jerry and a spoon.

7.You wake up in the morning and see that it is eight am and think," Oh! We slept in this morning."

8. You are asleep before ten pm.

9. You find yourself humming tunes to your kids favorite shows while you are food shopping or running errands.

10.Nothing means more to you than your children.

I love every little annoying thing about both my children because they wouldn't be who they are if they were flawless well behaved tots.

It's the crazy stuff, the messes, and the fights that keeps life interesting.

Creating A New World

This blog post is really just a shout out to everyone who has inspired and helped me though the journey of writing a book.

There have been plenty of days when all I wanted to do was give up and cry. Staying awake all night because I was afraid if my idea's weren't written immediately I'd forget them. ( I probably would have!) Endless hours staring at my computer with writers block, just hoping something... anything would come to mind.

Knowing, and feeling so amateur compared to thousands of incredible writers out there, working as hard, if not harder than me, has at times made me feel like I have no idea what I'm doing.

But also knowing that even if I never get published, I have so many incredible friends that will read my first attempt at a book and I know I've accomplished something incredible. So thank you to everyone that has kept me going and told me to never give up and everyone who has listened to me complain and wiped my tears during my monthly meltdown.

Especially thank you to those of you that have let me bounce idea's off you, even if I wasn't making any sense. Thank you for the website suggestions, the harsh critique, and reading pages for me.

My book has become so real to me. I feel like the characters are apart of my life now, and I can't wait to share it with all of you.

This Is The Same As That

So most of you know how obsessed I am with eating healthy and exercising. Well, thanks to my obsession I am constantly comparing different foods to one another, and their calories, calories from fat and sugar etc. This post is merely to point out that most people have no clue what they are actually eating let alone the amount of calories and sugar that are in the foods we eat!

I went online last night and pulled up Mc Donald's nutrition menu. How they can even have the word nutrition anywhere near their menu is something that will baffle me until the end of time. Advertising is key in making us think we are eating healthy or getting something nutritious out of our food.

For Example, let's say you are feeling brave and decide to eat at Mc Donalds (gulp) and you think if you order the grilled chicken sandwich and small fries that you are eating healthy. If I could take that chicken sandwich and smack you with it I would.
Reality Check: Premium Grilled Chicken Sandwich is 420 Calories
Small Fry is 230
Now that is a 650 calorie meal not including a drink or dipping sauce. Not to mention the disgusting crap your sandwich is made out of. (YUCK!!!)

Eating that meal is the same as eating eight lemon butter salmon filets at 80 calories a filet. ( Unbreaded and no salt. Baked, not fried)

Just because I was so grossed out by this, I have to put it out there. A Mc Donald's Big Breakfast with hotcakes is a whopping 1150 calories. (WTF is anybody thinking when they order this??)

Did you know for a woman to maintain her body weight she should be eating 1200-1600 calories per day depending on exercise level. This disgusting breakfast almost tops that out, and before 9 am no less.

They also advertise fruit smoothie's now, but according to their "nutrition chart" there isn't one smoothie offered that is under 210 calories or less than 40 grams of sugar. Did you know there is less sugar in a two liter bottle of coke?!

So if you ordered a smoothie, that's the same as drinking two eight ounce glasses of Yoplait's ( actually real) fruit smoothies at 80 calories a glass and only 11 grams of sugar. Oh, wait... it still doesn't equal the sugar shit smoothie Mc Donald's offers.

So, be aware of what you eat because even if it isn't having an effect on you now, it will catch up to you later! Be smart, eat healthy. ( Translation, don't think you are eating healthy, know you are eating healthy. Good food doesn't come out of a drive thru window!!)
A few of my know it all tips...
-Switch from regular potato chips to baked chips and only eat the recommended serving size. If the calories state 120 calories a serving but you are eating four servings...defeats the purpose!

-Pack healthy lunches on road trips to avoid getting any type of fast food

- Eat food high in fiber, they keep you feeling fuller longer.

- Get your blood pumping by exercising everyday, even if it's just a brisk walk around your neighborhood after dinner. :)

Give A Little Bit

Why is showing off brand names and logo's so important? A purse is a purse isn't it? You put all your junk in it, you toss it on the floor of your car, you drop it on the floor when you get home from work. So why do people spend thousands of dollars on something you fling over your shoulder?

Now, for those of you who are making the big bucks you probably don't see a problem with this at all. You think, hey, I have the money so why not indulge?

If you have they money, why not do something more significant with it than blowing thousands of dollars on a bag, or two hundred dollars on a pair of jeans? Take that two hundred dollars and buy groceries for a family in need, or that three thousand dollars and support your favorite charity. If you are really successful, pay someone's way through college. Crazy?? Maybe! But I actually know someone who did it for more than one person. :)

I guess I don't understand why more of us aren't paying it forward and why we are so focused of material shit we don't really need.

I always feel better doing something for someone else than for myself. It's actually pretty contagious once you start. Just go up to a random someone and give them a hug, or compliment them on what they are wearing. Start small and then work your way up to bigger and more giving things.

If you are financially able, organize an afternoon with friends and give away free sandwiches, instead of spending hundreds of dollars on a cob salad at a fancy restaurant. Serve free coffee in your neighborhood!

Go through your old clothes, and furniture, have a free yard sale or donate to GoodWill without requiring a tax write off.( Kinda defeats the purpose of giving if you expect to get compensated for it down the road.)

Just venting some pent up frustrations about how selfish the world can be. There are so many other things going on in the world that are way more important than a stupid Louis Vuitton bag.

Oh! And just and FYI- Did you know that in 2005 an anonymous bidder bought a pair of 155 year old Levi 501 Jeans for sixty thousand dollars. This just disgusted me.

Simple Sacrifices

Kids, and life itself can really drain your bank account. Things are always coming up,or breaking, or being broken. Let's face it, kids never ever stop growing. (The cost of brand new kids clothes can be outrageous.)

If you want to save some cash, here are a few simple sacrifices you and your family can make so you can spend less and save more. The days of wanting a five dollar barbie or a matchbox car are way over. Now it's playstations and flat screens.

1. Buy gently used clothes ( If you start doing this when they are young, they will never know the difference. What's the point of buying brand new? It's four times the cost and they are going to grow out of in in a few months anyway. Most second hand shops will even buy back the stuff that doesn't fit!! BONUS!)

2. Avoid having a car payment ( This can really suck you dry every month. If possible, become a one car family and share. If not, avoid financing and buy a used car you can pay for up front.)

3. Cut back your cable bill. ( You can do this by downgrading your current plan. Is there really a need to have six movie channels that rotate between the same six movies every week. If you really can't live without movies, downgrade to basic cable and sign up for Netflix. It's way cheaper and you have your choice of any movie unlimited every months.)

4. Plan meals a week in advance ( Doing this avoids having to go back to the store every day and then buying unnecessary items, making you spend more. Make a menu for the week and then shop for the whole week. Plus it saves time and money. Fast food is absolutely disgusting and not nutritious in anyway. In planning meals, and being creative, you can feed a family of four for under ten dollars a meal, the cost of one value size combo.)

5. Free exercise ( Gym memberships can be pricey, but some rec centers have free gyms if you're a town resident. If not, find some fun hiking trails in your area and make it a weekend routine with the whole family. Do yoga, or have daily dance time with your kids. They'll have a blast running around to their favorite songs, and you'll love burning calories.)

6. Be energy efficient ( Wash clothes in cold water, open windows or use ceiling fans instead of the ac. In winter months, if you have a big house,or unused rooms there is no need to heat them. Close off the vents or turn off the radiator and you won't waste heat. Plus you will smile, not frown when you get your electric bill. Suck it up, don't be so quick to turn on the heat, a sweater and a cozy pair of socks can work pretty well when it's just a little cool outside.)

7. Be Creative (We always think we have to buy everything we need. Brand new baby toys and furniture are ridiculously expensive. Ask a friend or family member if you can borrow a crib, or baby swing. They only sleep in it for a couple years. It's not worth spending $800 plus dollars on that. Again, second hand stores, or even Goodwill can have some pretty awesome stuff if you look. Before you run out a buy a new picture frame, just make one. Spice up an old table with a new coat of paint, or buy slip covers for an old couch. Go to a bookstore and check out a craft book, don't buy it, but jot down a few good ideas.)

8. Family Game Night ( Instead of rushing out to the local movie theater, have a family game night, or invite friends to join you or host a movie night. Make popcorn, and get a front row seat to your favorite movies. It will be a fraction of the cost of taking the family to the theater at ten dollars a ticket. Not to mention the overpriced, unhealthy snacks they offer.


These are just a few of many wonderful idea's to save money and have fun doing it as well. If you think you can't trust yourself not to spend the extra cash you'll have lying around open up an interest bearing savings account and set a savings goal, then treat yourself and family to something fun.

Mommy's Not Here

Whoever said that the more years between your kids the easier it is, should seriously go to hell. I'd rather have three two year olds than the six year age gap between my two little monsters.

Tying to put ABC flash cards in a little baggy one-at-a-time, while helping do word sorts for my son's homework is not my idea of a fun relaxing evening. Did I mention my son was complaining about doing his homework and purposely writing his sentences sloppy just to make me mad while my daughter was screaming because she is just too cool to use her big girl words? Oh, and the dog was jumping on the counter trying to get left overs.

Some nights I wish someone would just put me in time out and I promise, I will sit there quietly. Or maybe have my body go on auto pilot. My husband works nights so I am left to fend for myself. Make dinner, clean up dinner, homework, baths, and the unknown nightly dramas that seems to occur. I seem to be a magnet for disasters. ( Two spilled glasses of water, with ice. I left the water running over a pot filled with dish liquid. Soap suds were everywhere.)

Most days I have a very lovely schedule I stick to that starts early in the AM and doesn't end until I fall asleep on the couch. Awesome as it is to have such a strict plan for the day, it can be a downfall as well. Do you know what happens when you have a plan like that and one little piece of it falls out of place? The entire day comes crashing down right on you!

My hard learned advice:
1. Start each day without a plan
2. Know that anything can and will happen
3. Baby's nap time is your nap time (read a book, watch a movie, relax)
4. When you feel like everything is falling apart, order take-out and go out for ice cream.
5. Even if you don't feel like it, have sex! You just might surprise yourself.
6. Date Nights without kids are very very important.
7. It's okay if you lose your temper...you're only human
8. Bubble baths after the kids go to bed while listening to your favorite tunes
9. Initiate food fights every once in a while (hehe the kids will love it)
10. Remind yourself that no mom is perfect ( If you ever happen to find one that is, let me know and we'll go egg her house ;)

Keeping the house clean, making dinner, and trying to stay fit is tough for any mom. Men can have eight kids and still look the exact same. No stretch marks, weight gain, or sagging body parts. (Sooo unfair) I feel like no matter what your post preggo bod looks like, or how clean or un-clean your house is that you rock no matter what. Being a mom is incredible!